Published on April 13th, 2015 | by Healthy Gay Lifestyles0
HIV+… So What?
by Rick Clemons
Honestly, I’m not HIV+.
Truthfully, I have several friends who are, and I’m sick and tired of the stigma.
Strap a condom on it, play safe and get over yourselves.
Yes, if I was single, in the market, and on the playing field, I’d be pretty likely to date a HIV+ guy if the communication, compatibility, and chemistry were there.
Fine call me a risk taker, or a romantic. Truth is, if the guy was upfront with me and I felt that I wanted it to go further, then I’d follow my heart and beg my logic to follow.
It all comes down to some common sense, decency, and respect. And, no I don’t want to hear any say, “Well if they had any common sense, decency, or respect for themselves, they wouldn’t have ended up HIV+!” Well bully from Mr. Judgmental, glad you have it all figured out how you’re going to “stay clean!
”What I find so appalling and frustrating is there are guys that will cast a hell of a catch of an HIV+ guy aside to go jump in the sack with some guy that ends up giving them some other STD. Yes, I realize some of those diseases are curable, but others never go away, just like HIV. Yet, the big HIV stamp of uncleanliness scars guys like my friend Darren (name changed to protect his beauty) for life!
Handsome, killer smile, highly successful, and the type of guy you’d take home to Mom & Dad, even if they didn’t want you bringing a guy home. He is that wonderful! That is until he shares with some holier than thou guys that he’s positive. Even when he shares that he’s undetectable, the boys – and I don’t mean that in a coy way – the immature, uneducated boys, turn heal and run.
But what I find so appalling is the 6-pack ab, 9” penis, bubble butt Adonis who digs you al the way to the proverbial bedroom will turn heels and run at the mention of HIV. Yet, he doesn’t realize, he in his own way is damaged goods, carrying around the life long disease and scars of his parents divorce, his inability to maintain a solid relationship, or possibly even the sickness of use ‘em and leave ‘em as he does in almost encounter he has.
The irony of the epidemics that seem to hit just a few of us in our journey on the planet is that we’re all damaged goods, living with an rampant disease that will stay with us for life, and which doesn’t make us any better than any other gay man. That epidemic is judgment – of ourselves and others…and yes it starts and reflects on ourselves regardless of where we’re casting the damn judgment.
The moment we become mindful to our judgments towards others is the moment we as gay men become mindful of our judgments towards ourselves, and start correcting the Hypocritical Insidious Venomous attacks on one another. Then and only then will there be a POSITIVE cure for acceptance of each other in our community that can then spread like an infections disease across the planet. The only difference is that POSITIVE acceptance for one another is a deadly disease; it’s a long lasting cocktail of hope for all mankind!
Rick Clemons, Life Strategist, Author, Professional Speaker, Entrepreneur
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